


Birthday Cake

by Listenerofshadows



Series: Sander Sides One-Shots [13]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst/Fluff, Crying, Gen, Logan has a sweet tooth and you cant change my mind, Platonic LAMP - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-07-10 11:39:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15948602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Listenerofshadows/pseuds/Listenerofshadows
Summary: “He doesn’t have to have chocolate cake only on birthdays; the only difference between birthday cake and normal cake is the day it’s served on. If it’s made up of the same ingredients, and baked the same way, then it will taste the same regardless of the day.” // Logan struggles with the concept of birthdays.





	Birthday Cake

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this several months back on my Tumblr but I forgot to cross-post this onto AO3 so here we are!
> 
> Original message:
> 
> Many thanks to @kawaii-kiwi984 for sending in their sentence-starter prompt.
> 
> Story time! Long ago, back in February, I asked @fandergecko if they’d like to collab with me for Logan’s name day and through it we became the best of friends! After four months of various complications I’m happy to announce the fruit of our labor is finally ready for everyone to see. Happy late birthday, Logan–better late than never eh?
> 
> [PLEASE GO CHECK IT OUT THEIR SIDE OF THE COLLAB.](https://fandergecko.tumblr.com/post/174796161665/birthday-cake-the-ficmore-ok-so-because) I’m sobbing, I was only expecting like a simple sketch or something bUT THEY DID A FREAKING 7-PANEL COMIC FULL COLORED AND SHADED. THEY’RE AN AMAZING ARTIST AND ONE OF THE KINDEST PEOPLE YOU’LL EVER MEET.

The day had ended and so had his birthday, it was probably for the best that the others hadn’t remembered. As technically, he didn’t have a birthday. None of them did. They were all parts of a whole. Thomas, to be precise. It was then logical to presume that Thomas’ birthday was their birthday.

Patton, on the other hand, thought otherwise. That man could make a national holiday out of the most miniscule of things. He insisted on putting festivities for the anniversaries of their first Vine and Youtube appearances. Logan could acknowledge the significance of those events; what he didn’t understand was Patton’s insistence on calling them birthdays.

“Patton,” He stated once in an exasperated tone, “Birthdays are the celebration of the day on which a person was born, typically treated with the giving of gifts. We’re only part of a person, and it’s hard to say when we manifested into being–but the point is, what we are celebrating is not what one considers a birthday, but rather the celebration of an anniversary.”

Patton hummed as he dipped his finger in chocolate icing to taste it.

“Mmm, that’s one definition, teach,” Patton said with a gleam in his eyes, “But the English language has a lotta different definitions for things, right? Birthdays are all about celebrating someone’s existence–and you’re right. We don’t know when we came into being. But that’s okay! Because of a lot people don’t know their true birthdays either. This day is the first-time other people became aware of your existence, and that’s something we should celebrate.”

Logan bit his tongue, as he stared at the moral side. He often forgot how astute Patton could be at times.

“I see. Following that line of logic, one could argue this is a birthday.” Logan fiddled with his tie.

Patton beamed at him.

“Hey what does an elephant want for his birthday?”

“Wh-I’d assume it would enjoy vegetation–”

“A trunk-ful of gifts!”

Just like that, Patton was back to his normal self again.

He laughed as Logan groaned at the pun.

“Do you think you can give me a second opinion on this icing?” Patton asked, offering the chocolate-covered spatula as a peace offering gift.

Logan obliged, letting the particles of the buttercream icing overwhelm his taste buds.

“Mmm.” A soft moan escaped him, and he clamped his mouth shut with his hand.

“Didja like it?” Patton grinned.

“It is…satisfactory, as always, Patton.” Logan said, once he regained composure.

He quickly fled the kitchen not long after that.

The Birthday celebration wasn’t just for anniversaries like Vine or Youtube. Whenever one of the other sides were feeling down, Patton would declare a day to be their birthday. He’d make up some flimsy excuse like, it was the anniversary of the first time they gave him a hug or made cookies with him. But everyone knew the true purpose behind them.

What happened each birthday depend entirely on the side.

Roman was like a child on Christmas Day. He pranced about the mindscape with eyes that sparkled and smiles that stretched ear to ear. They typically traversed the kingdom on his days, letting him drag them from location to location. When they didn’t go to his kingdom, they participated in Disney marathons.

Virgil was a newcomer to Patton’s birthday celebrations. He rolled his eyes at Patton’s antics, murmuring phrases such as “People don’t usually celebrate the existence of Anxiety.”

To which Patton would squeeze him and firmly say, “People shouldn’t talk bad stuff about my son.”

This always succeeded in eliciting a smile from Virgil.

Virgil’s first birthday they celebrated with him had been…emotional for the lack of a better word. They had before never celebrated his presence as a good thing and so his previous birthdays passed without any hoopla. To be fair, Patton had tried reaching out to Virgil before, but his attempts had always ended in failure.

The three of them had put their heads together and decided to put on a birthday celebration he’d never forget.  One birthday could not make up for the countless others forgotten, but it would help remind Virgil he was accepted and loved.

Virgil had nearly burst into tears when he walked into the kitchen for breakfast to find purple-and-black party decorations occupying the room. He mostly kept his composure throughout breakfast.  He finally broke down when the others started showering him with gifts.

His few days since then proved to be mellower than Roman’s. They played board-games and spent time just in the general company of one another.

Roman spearheaded the jubilees when it was Patton’s birthday. That was alright with Logan–he was more in tune with emotions after all. They usually attempted making breakfast in bed for Patton, with varying levels of success. Patton always ate their food, complimenting their cooking regardless of how burnt it was.

He then would get out of bed and show them the right way of cooking. Afterwards they’d partake in a variety of activities depending on Patton’s mood. Sometimes it was frolicking with the dogs in Roman’s meadow. Other times it was marathons of cartoons like Steven Universe.

Logan, of course, had birthdays of his own as insisted upon by Patton. He liked watching Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Who, but he also liked having reading days. Which involved all of them sitting and reading books from their preferred genres. Sometimes they’d burst into animated discussions about whatever they were reading. Once, he attempted doing science experiments with the others, and once was enough.

Regardless of whose day it was, it always ended the same. They all had the person’s favorite food for supper, and for dessert, birthday cake. Patton always made a rich, gourmet chocolate cake with chocolate icing for Logan. The textures of the cake were very pleasing to Logan’s taste buds.

It is because of Patton’s long documentation of celebrating these so-called birthdays, that Logan made a presumption that he’d do the same for name reveals. That is, when they first revealed their names in the videos. Logan’s name was the first name revealed, so he readied himself for the inevitable festivities.

The birthday wishes, the party streamers, the breakfast shaped like a face. He’s ready to grin and bear it all.

(And it has nothing to do with the fact he’s been secretly salivating that chocolate cake)

Except, nothing of the sort happened. Logan found himself to be wrong, an occurrence that is becoming far too common for his liking. As he sat in his room, the day’s event played out in his mind, repeatedly.

He had woken up in the morning to find no one was there at breakfast. No Patton flipping pancakes. No Roman whistling Disney tunes under his breath. No Virgil sitting at the table with a coffee mug that read “Don’t Talk With Me”

The mystery of the others’ absences is revealed when Thomas abruptly summons him. They’re all there, with furrowed brows typically associated with worry.

“Greetings everyone,” He adjusted his tie, “What seems to be the matter, Thomas?”

Thomas opened his mouth, but Roman cut him off.

“N-nothing! We solved it, there’s no need of further ‘dissecting’ it or whatever you like to do. It’s over, farewell!”

“Roman,” Both Thomas and Patton admonished but the Creative side already sunk down into the mindscape.

Logan glances over to Thomas.

“Is it true you don’t need…my help?”

“Not for this one, buddy.” Thomas shook his head, “But I do appreciate your insight.”

Logan nodded his head in acknowledgement, but for some reason he didn’t quite believe his words. They all said their goodbyes to Thomas and sunk back into the mindscape.

Roman was in the kitchen, scrounging in the cupboards for Frozen-themed cereal.  A very neat and orderly kitchen, one devoid of those obnoxious party decorations Logan realized.

It’s not just that. None of the others give him the customary birthday greetings and Logan’s eggs and bacon aren’t shaped like a face. There was an anxious feeling in the air, and it wasn’t just Virgil. They all sat there in silence, drumming their fingers against the table, fidgeting in their seats, avoiding eye contact. Logan enjoyed silence, but he’d never understood how silence could be suffocating until this moment.

“I’m-uh, going to be in my room.” Patton announced, “it’s a little messy, I admit.”  
  


“Would you like some help in organizing it?” Logan asked politely.

Patton shook his head vigorously.

“No, that’s alright! I’m sure you’ve got a lot on your plate today.” Patton squeezed his shoulder, before leaving.

The others departed soon after.

“Well, I’m off to go slay a dragon,” Roman dramatically brandished his sword before sinking out.

Virgil scoffed at Roman’s antics, “I’ll be in my room.”

Logan lingered in the kitchen. Patton’s words echoing in the back of his mind in a continuous loop. He had been too embarrassed to admit to Patton that he had work planned today at all because he assumed they’d be celebrating his birthday.

He finally left to go to his room, at last. He picked out a book to read from his library and settled on his office chair to read it. He didn’t read it. His eyes scanned over the content listlessly, retaining nothing as he flipped a page occasionally. His mind is occupied with other things.

Logan must be jumping to conclusions. Roman’s comment was just that–another barbed comment in a long list of barbed comments. Roman disliked the way Logan always poked holes in his creations. It made sense why he would dislike Logan offering his analyses on the problem. But there were the others’ reactions to take into consideration. The whole matter was imbued with emotions, and why was it that emotions were always the bane of his existence?

He thought about questioning the lack of festivities…but wasn’t that a good thing? The others knew his outward disdain for it, perhaps Patton had gotten the hint. Besides, he wasn’t Roman. Asking about it would make it seem he wanted the attention. And he knew that Patton would do it, no questions asked.

Except, some part of him hoped there still cake waiting for him as he walked down the hallway towards the kitchen. Something sweet certainly wafted in the air, although it didn’t mean anything. Patton liked baking sweets all the time. He was halfway towards the kitchen, when Roman popped up in front of him.

“Logan!” He swung an arm around him, “Just the side I was looking for! Do you think you could help proofread ideas for future videos?”

“I don’t know,” Logan said coolly, “I thought you disliked my habit of ‘dissecting’ your ideas.”

Roman’s grip tightened.

“I didn’t mean it like that! It’s just we already solved the problem and there was no point in dragging out I just–” Roman huffed, “Look, will you please help me out?”

Logan sighed, pressing his glasses to the bridge of his nose.

“Fine.” He agreed.

At the very least, his time could be served in a more productive manner. Roman whooped, patting his back a few times a little too enthusiastically for Logan’s taste.

“I’ll be right with you in a moment, I’m going to get–”

“Woah, wait!” Roman jumped in front of him.

“Roman, I’m just going to get a sandwich.”

Roman snapped his fingers and a platter of sandwiches fell into Logan’s hands.

“There you go! All the sandwiches you could ever dream up! Now, let us be off! The sooner we get to the ideas, the sooner I can get them to Thomas!”

Logan rolled his eyes, chalking it up to Roman’s usual foolery. The fanciful side was always rushing things, always looking forward to newer and better possibilities.

He went through the motion of what is just a normal day–because it is. It isn’t his birthday–he doesn’t have a birthday.

They spent the entire afternoon arguing over ideas. By the end of it, many papers were stacked in the discard pile, and those that were accepted had a lot of red ink on them.  They somehow got into a discussion about physics in action movies after that. It’s an argument they’ve had many times, likely many times more in the future. Except today his points were less polished, his mind still occupied by other thoughts.

A knock sounded on the door, and Virgil poked his head in.

“Patton sent me to tell you two dinners’ ready.”

“Excellent!” Roman straightened out his jacket as he stood up.

Dinner was leftovers. Logan doesn’t know why he expected it to be anything else. Patton rambled apologetically about how he spent the whole day busier than he thought he’d be. The others seemed once more antsy to leave. Logan was the first one to leave this time.

“I’m going to turn in for the night.”

“Are you sure, we were thinking of–”

“Yes. I’m…tired.” Logan said, sinking down to his room.

And so, the day had ended and so had his birthday, it was probably for the best that the others hadn’t remembered. Because he didn’t have a birthday, ergo there was no point in celebrating something that didn’t exist.

Even if had existed, birthdays were only dismal reminders that they increasingly had less time to accomplish the things they set out to do.

He’d once thought that the anniversary of a name reveal would’ve been important, at least. Names are important. They’re more than just identifiers to help distinguish humans from one another. Names hold meaning and prestige. Back when monarchs ruled, names determined your place in life.

Most importantly, his name belonged to only him. He wasn’t just Logic; he was Logan, as well. While he hadn’t personally revealed it to Thomas, he hadn’t minded that Patton let it slip out. It had felt good to be seen as something more than Logic in Thomas’ eyes. He hadn’t escaped to notice how the name reveals started to change Thomas’ perceptions of them. He’d always been kind and friendly to them, but there’s something interesting about the way a name has a psychological effect on people.

But perhaps names were simply just names and there were no significant attachments to them. They were no cause for celebration. Maybe it was deeper than that. As he reflected more, he remembered the events that transpired that day. How he had dressed as Sherlock and grilled everyone until he realized the real culprit had been himself. It wasn’t because names didn’t matter, but rather, this was an anniversary of when he had hindered Thomas. Nobody wanted to celebrate a failure. No one celebrated the anniversary of the day they were sick or injured, so why should they celebrate this day?

Counter-thesis. Perhaps the others hadn’t forgotten but remembered all along. It explained their erratic behavior. Why Patton was hesitant for his help, how Roman had snapped at him.

It was for the best the others hadn’t done anything then. He told himself that. Birthdays are illogical. They are pointless, name or no name. He told himself these things, and yet he kept envisioning that chocolate cake in his mind.

He started scribbling down logical proofs on sheets of paper.

_“Birthdays are full of emotions, Logan wants nothing to do with emotions. Therefore, he wants nothing to do with birthdays.”_

_“He doesn’t have to have chocolate cake only on birthdays; the only difference between birthday cake and normal cake is the day it’s served on. If it’s made up of the same ingredients, and baked the same way, then it will taste the same regardless of the day.”_

_“All humans have birthdays. Logan is not human. Therefore, Logan does not have a birthday.”_

“Logan.” Someone shook his shoulder, and he looked up to see Virgil standing over him worriedly. He drew back from the contact, causing the anxious side to immediately give him space.

He blinked and realized it’s not just Virgil in his room, but all the others, including Thomas. They all look concerned.

“What’s wrong? I tried summoning you in my apartment and you didn’t come.” Thomas asked.

“You did?” Logan shot straight up, “That’s concerning. I didn’t intentionally wall myself up—I can’t do that, I’m an integral part of you no matter what. You didn’t feel overtly illogical than normal, right?”

Thomas shook his head.

“Then what could be the problem? If you can still reason, then I should’ve…” Logan swallowed a lump in his throat as an alarming thought came to him.

“Logan?” Patton looked at him, concerned.

“Perhaps I’m…no longer needed.” He confessed, wincing at their voices overlapping with alarm.

“Listen,” Logan speaks over them, “You were able to solve a problem without my assistance this morning, right? So…perhaps your need for me to physically manifest has diminished. I’ve always been a representation of your logic, not quite your logic itself. After all, I have to admit our existences defy logical sense and—”

“Logan, what is this?” Roman interrupted, as he picked up one of Logan’s papers. The papers he marked up all about how birthdays were irrelevant and—

“Wait!“ Logan cried out desperately, reaching out to try to snatch it out of his hands.

That only invigorated Roman’s curiosity more, and he held the paper out of Logan’s reach.

“This is one of your poems, isn’t it? Don’t worry, I won’t judge too harshly,” Roman’s laughter died, as he read what was truly on the paper. The others peered around his shoulder to see what had stricken him.

Logan clutched his fists and tried remaining calm. The day was supposed to over without the others remembering. Now they knew, and they’d feel sorry because he’s fading and—

“Logan, buddy,” Virgil softly intoned, “calm down.”

Virgil stood nearby, hovering over him. Patton looked just about ready to launch himself at Logan and embrace him. Roman held him back, the Prince’s mouth opening and closing as he thought of words to say. Logan closed his eyes, unable to look at the others.

“It—it was a calculated guess based on prior observations, but…it appears I was mistaken, and I do not expect you to celebrate it—"

Someone hugged Logan, and he opens his eyes to see that it’s Thomas. He trembled, and Logan robotically placed his arms around Thomas to help soothe him.

“Logan,” Thomas said, as they draw out of the hug, “We have something to show you.”

“Where?” He asked once finding his voice.

“In my apartment.”

He breathed.

“Okay.”

He let himself sink down with the others. His eyes were assaulted with the flash of white that typically happened when he rose into the physical realm. As colors swarmed back into view, he’s stunned by what he sees.

Party streamers and balloons in the exact shade of his necktie were scattered throughout the living room. There was a banner above the kitchen pass-through that reads “HAPPY B-DAY LOGAN.” On the table before the pass-through, sat a triple-tier chocolate cake with chocolate icing.

“Su-surprise?” Roman offered, weakly doing jazz hands.

“You were…” Logan’s breath hitched, “You planned a surprise party for me?”

“Oh Logan, honey, we wanted to do something special—we didn’t mean to make it seem like we forgot.” Patton nervously messed with the ends of his cardigan.

“I was unnecessarily unkind to you this morning. I was careless with my words—too focused on not letting the cat out of bag to realize I had harmed you.” Roman hung his head low.

“I told everyone it was a bad idea.” Virgil mumbled.

“It was.” Logan said.

Everyone looked at him in shock—even Virgil seemed surprised at how readily he agreed with him.

“This isn’t technically my birthday—I don’t have a birthday. My name isn’t something to make a fuss out of, especially in consideration of the fact of the reminder of what this day is—”

“What’s wrong with this day?” Thomas furrowed his brows.

“It’s the day that I—I,” He took a deep breath, “failed you, Thomas. I let you down, and I understand if you don’t want to celebrate that—”

“Logan, it’s okay to make mistakes at times. No one’s perfect, and I don’t expect you to be. But Logan—you’ve helped me so much this past year. I—we need you, buddy. It’s hard to believe there was a time that I only knew you as Logic. Remember what you said to me that day? You’re more than just Logic, you’re also Logan. And I think…it’s okay for Logan to have a birthday, if he wants.”

“Thomas is right,” Roman spoke up, “We’ve always had our differences, but it’s your plans that help Thomas to be able to obtain his dreams.”

“Logan, you…help me see the bigger picture of things,” Virgil huffed, “and ‘sides if you left, I’d be the only sane one here.”

“Logan,” Patton’s lips trembled, “Do you remember what I told you during the Hogwarts video?”

“I believed you said I was…your hero.”

“That’s right!” Patton grinned before sobering, “and I meant it, Logan. You help me see reason. Like Thomas can’t afford to adopt thirty dogs—even though they’re all super adorable—because he doesn’t have time to care for them all and it wouldn’t be fair to them—”

“Patton,” Logan said gently, raising an eyebrow in amusement.

“See! Even there you help me stay on track!” Patton laughed as he took off his glasses to wipe off his tears, “Yes, Thomas would still have logic even if you ceased to physically manifest, but we wouldn’t have you, Logan. That’s why we celebrate birthdays—we celebrate the existence of someone close to us—how much we cherish their presences. And we love you so much, kiddo!”

Logan cleared his throat, as he covertly wiped away a few tears from his face.

“Thank you, everyone for your input. You’ve caused to realize that my previous thought processes had been…faulty. I suppose that…” Logan broke into a smile, “following that line of logic, one could argue this is a birthday.”

Patton grinned back, and there was a familiar glint in his eyes—one Logan recognized whenever he was about to make a terrible joke.

“Hey Logan—”

“Don’t.”

“What does a clam do on his birthday?”

“Th-they do nothing. They aren’t sentient enough—”

“He shellabrates!” Patton and Thomas chorused together.

Logan groaned, but this time was in unison with both Roman and Virgil.

“C’mon, teach,” Patton bounced towards the kitchen table, “Do you think you could give me an opinion on this cake?”

“Knowing you, I am certain it will be satisfactory,” Logan said, following him.

They gathered around the table and sang the traditional birthday song. The first piece went to Logan, along with a bowl of ice cream separate from his cake.

There was something about cake served on birthdays that defies logic. You can bake a cake using the same ingredients following the same ingredients, but it will not taste the same as a birthday cake. It was one of the universe’s greatest unsolved mysteries, one that could perhaps not be solved by science.

Logan had tried baking a cake once, but it hadn’t turned out the same as Patton’s.

“Oh! That’s because I add a special ingredient!” Patton winked.

“What’s that?”

“Love.”

Logan, at the time, had went on a ramble about how illogical that had been. There had to be more to it than that. Logically, cake should taste the same no matter the occasion. Birthday, or no Birthday. Love, or no love. But, as he sinks his teeth into the sugary deliciousness of the cake—he thinks perhaps there’s a truth to Patton’s words, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think of the fic in the comments below! ^^'
> 
> Also, if you haven't gotten a chance to check out Gecko's side of the collab please go check out their [beautiful art](https://fandergecko.tumblr.com/post/174796161665/birthday-cake-the-ficmore-ok-so-because)


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